If you struggle to find time in your busy day to sit with Jesus, to pray, or to get in your Bible, then this post is for you! I often hear my mom friends talk about how hard it is to find time and space for the Word or for prayer as a wife and/or mother. There is constantly someone or something that is demanding your time - sometimes 24/7. Children, messes, the house, the yard, the laundry, grocery shopping, making breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks in between; throw in a job, errands and appointments, and by that point you are more than ready to throw in the towel, but wait, you still have to get the kids to bed...
I know you're busy, but I know that you will be happier, more patient, and more at peace if you make time for Jesus. So, I'm going to show you why this time is so important, remind you that YOU are important, and then give you some very practical steps for creating a consistent quiet time that works well for you.
How Do You Make Time For Yourself?
So, how do you make time? First, you have to believe that you are valuable! You have to believe that you are valuable enough to make space and to make time for you. The best thing you can do for yourself, and for your family, is make time to fill up, and to invest in the most important relationship you will ever have, your relationship with Jesus. Because when your cup is full and overflowing, you can give to, and care for, your family with love, rather than operate in constant frustration and resentment. You have a big job, and a very important one, and I want you to thrive in it! Taking time each day to connect with God, to be encouraged and instructed by His word, and to set your eyes on things above will help you love your babies well. It will help you extend grace to your family and yourself on hard days, and will equip you for all of the things life throws at you.
When to Have Quiet Time With God?
Practically, this looks different for everyone and, honestly, it will probably need some adjusting with every new season. Life happens! We all know that, and every season we go through, every new child or new endeavor, you may need to adjust your time and your approach. For example, when I was single I would spend time in the morning with the Lord, usually outside, before school or work, as well as have prayer time before bed every night. When I got married, this was a real struggle, especially when I had a newborn 10 months later and a husband in Afghanistan. My normal time with the Lord didn’t work. I longed for my one on one time, and I felt guilty that I wasn’t able to make it work, but I was absolutely exhausted.
My daughter was a very hard baby and would cry every night, literally, from 10 p.m. to 1 a.m. and wake frequently from then on until 6 or 7 when she was up for the day. She was also not a good napper, so finding time for Jesus without falling asleep was a huge task! I eventually started having my quiet time on walks while I carried her in my Moby wrap or pushed her in the stroller. Once she was a little older and naps were a little easier, I would have my quiet time during her longer nap of the day. But then I got pregnant with my son, and my body made a new alarm clock that would wake me up at 3:00 am. every morning, so I started using that as my quiet time since I couldn’t fall back to sleep for at least an hour. I would go into the living room and sit in the glider rocker and pray until I was ready to go back to bed. It was really sweet time for me - the house was so quiet and serene. Then he was born, and I had to find another time that worked, and so on… You get the point, I’m sure!
While everyone is different and everyone has a different schedule and life circumstances, some times that may work for you are:
First thing in the morning. If you don't mind waking up a bit earlier, set your alarm 30-60 minutes earlier, grab your coffee or tea, and start the morning right.
On your lunch break. If you're working full days, but get a solid lunch break, eat your lunch while you read or spend time talking to the Lord.
During your child's nap. If your kiddo consistently naps during the day, this is a great time for you to also rest and be filled up by the Lord! Plus, it'll give you a second "wind" to make it through the evenings strong (at least it does for me).
Set a designated quiet time. If your kids don't take naps anymore, have them have their own quiet time. I recommend they be in their own room, and do something that is quiet and alone like read books, build with blocks or Legos, color or do a craft, or any other activity that is quiet and can be done independently.
Before bed. Reading the word and spending time in prayer before bed is a great way to unwind at the end of the day, work through any hard things that happened that day, and prepare your mind for a peaceful night's rest
While you exercise. Running and walking, or doing another consistent activity, is sometimes a great time to pray, listen to worship music, and/or listen to an Audio Bible
Moral of the story - find a time that works for you and for your family. It will likely look different for everyone and that is okay! Also, start small! Having an hour or more to spend with Jesus is amazing! but not always practical. Set small, realistic goals for yourself, even if they seem silly. Say, “Today, I’m going to spend 15 minutes praying.” If it works out and you get 15 minutes, that’s a win! If it doesn’t, give yourself some grace and know God is happy that you are trying to make time for Him. He loves when we do! And try again tomorrow. If the time consistently doesn’t work, think about how you can adjust - maybe you can try a different time of day or maybe you come to the conclusion that sitting down with your Bible is not going to happen right now, and listen to an audio Bible instead. Whether reading or listening, the Word is going in and that’s what matters!
What Does Quiet Time With the Lord Look Like?
While it looks different for everyone, quiet time with the Lord should be quiet ; ) Worship music can be extremely helpful to get your heart and mind into the right place to meet with the Lord, but block out as much extra noise and distractions as possible. Have the kids be in another room doing something quiet, turn your phone on silent and put it in another room or somewhere out of sight, and commit to not multi-tasking (though I know you're so good at it!). This time is for you and Him. It doesn't matter how much you get done, how many verses or chapters you read, how long your prayers are, etc. Quiet time is about connection. It's about sharing your heart, and letting God speak. Let Him show you His heart, how He loves you, and what He desires for you.
Quiet time doesn't have to look the same everyday, but in general, it consists of time in the Word and in prayer. God's Word is timeless, it's helpful in every season and circumstance, and is alive and active, sharper than a double edged sword (Hebrews 4:12). God will speak to you through His word. He'll instruct you, challenge you, correct you, and encourage you through His word. Don't miss out on this! When you read the Bible, don't just read a verse here and there. Make sure to read it in context, so you don't misinterpret what it's saying. Get the whole picture.
While you read, or before you read, pray. Talk to God, because He bends down to hear (Psalm 116:2). He's listening, and He wants to speak. He says that His sheep hear His voice, so take time to listen for His response. I love to do this while journaling. It helps me focus, and allows me to go back and see if what I thought God said sounds like His Word (because His voice will never contradict His word). Third, praise Him! Even in the hardest of seasons, God is still good! He's still in control, He's still worthy. While we praise, God's presence is with us, our hearts are changed, and our perspective is restored to where it should be. If you need a step-by-step method for studying the Bible, check out my post HERE.
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